Rachel & Judith

Some people dread sitting in the group sections on trains. Heaven forbid you might be forced to face a complete stranger for six hours. But honestly, I prefer a wide-open space and a potentially friendly face to the back end of a semi-reclined chair supporting a rude, smelly, snoring beer gut with a beard.

As luck would have it, I got two friendly faces; Rachel, a student studying fashion, textiles, and interior design at UNC in her early twenties, and Judith, a sweet grandmotherly figure in her late sixties. Though complete strangers, the three of us fell easily into conversation.

Rachel, a child of early divorce, seems the type who always tries to make the best of bad situations. She lives as the lone neat-nik in a house full of irresponsible, messy girls. She maintains a long-distance relationship of three years, and she carries the responsibility of loving and caring for her horse, Bucket, a gift from her grandparents. 

I asked her if she planned to stay in the area, and was surprised by her answer. While she loved her smallish hometown in North Carolina, she did not want to remain in that environment, due to the small mindedness and racism still fairly prominent in her area. Apparently, it is commonplace to hear the term “Ni***r” used in everyday language in a derogatory way. I was taken aback, as it has literally been years since I have personally heard it used (not in films) in such a hateful way. Rachel experienced racism on a personal level, as she received a lot of grief over her Puerto Rican boyfriend. I suppose I was naïve to think that such blatant racism is only a problem of the past.

Further food for thought was served when Judith opened up about her journey back home to North Carolina. She was just in VA visiting her cousin, whose husband was living in the hell of stage four terminal cancer. What hit me the hardest about her tragic description was the severe lack of peace in the entire situation. Judith spoke of how Christmas cheer was nowhere to be found this year. He was not ready to die yet he knew he had to. All this produced was unmitigated misery.

I have known cancer patients, and I know how horrible a thing it is, but I have never met one who was without the hope of Christ. Every single one I have known believed that their salvation was to come, either in the form of their healing or in their ultimate homecoming. With this hope always came joy or peace amidst the suffering, like a candle in the darkness. But as I searched Judith’s face, there was none, just darkness and despair.

This caused me to think back to a memorial service I attended for a dear professor of mine who was taken well before her prime. Not a dry eye in the place, yet there was no room for gloom or darkness. We were all grieved, but our hearts were not heavy because we all rejoiced in the knowledge that she was in Paradise with her beloved Savior. It was such a beautiful service.

As I listened to Judith, I suddenly had a glimpse of what a secular funeral must be like. Empty. Hopeless. Pointless. A life was here on this earth, and then it wasn’t. At worst it was a waste of oxygen, and at best, an extraordinary person who might be remembered for great works, but ultimately, what was it all for? Even listening to Judith’s philosophy and views on living made me sad. Not that she was a natural Debbie Downer. In fact, she was a generally pleasant woman with a kind disposition. However, she described the world of the individual as a microcosm that only became smaller and smaller with age, until one was only aware of one’s immediate surroundings and the objects directly in front of them. All one can do is make do with what is in front of you.

I do not know what I would do if I lived in such a purposeless state. I do not know if I could sleep at night unless I was able to dream of worlds I’ve never seen. I do not know what I would do without the hope I have in Christ.

Oh the People You Meet

So, this is actually a bit of a montage of the people I have run into over the past few months. There is nothing quite like impact of human interaction.

I must tell you of one of the most touching interactions between a man and a woman that I have ever had the great fortune to witness. It was an older african american man, and an elderly caucasian woman. She came strolling his way, and his face lit up, as if the sun had leaned down and kissed it. Both of their eyes lit up when they saw each other. The twist... they were two homeless individuals on the streets of San Francisco. As the old woman approached with her shopping cart full of knick-knacks, the man jumped up from his post on the street corner, straightened out his tattered clothing as best as he could, and extended his arm in the most gentlemanly fashion to the nearest trash can, as if it were a chest full of royal gemstones. One by one, he pulled out the precious soda cans that he had been hoarding up for her. With childish glee, the two rejoiced over their shared treasures, not even noticing the rest of San Francisco whizzing by.

The second notable meeting was with a precious woman named Colleen. When I think about what a Christian, ideally, should look like, she is it. My sister and I were eating out with a friend at a great vegetarian cafe called Grilla Bites, and Colleen was our server. She was very friendly, and provided great service. The friend we were with had left lunch a bit early to return to work, so my sister and I hung out a while longer, and got a smoothie. As we started walking towards the parking garage, we realized that my sister had left the keys to our rental car in her trench-coat, which was left in our friend's car. So there we were, on vacation in NorCal, with dying cell phones, wondering how far a walk it would be to the nearest bus station, when Colleen (who had overheard our predicament while she was at the bar eating during her lunch break) offered to take us to our friend's car to get the keys. It felt a little strange accepting a ride from a total stranger, but she just seemed so sweet. Not only did she give us a ride to our friend's car, but she even drove us back to our rental car. It turns out, she not only serves at the restaurant, but she and her husband are the owners of the cafe. During the car ride she shared about her life and how she and her husband are also really involved in helping out the homeless in the community. In fact, they let one homeless guy sleep in the cafe after closing time. She says he is very protective of the place, and will even lock up for them at night, and report any strange going ons. What struck me most of all, was her incredible humility and love for the people around her. Even complete strangers like us. I think I wanna be like that.

Finally, my night with the European au pairs!
Many of the children at the school where I work have parents who both work full time jobs. Therefore, most of them have foreign nannies or au pairs. There was one in particular who hung around after school, letting the kids play on the playground before taking them home. Her name was Theresia. She looked a bit lonely, so I struck up a conversation with her, and was delighted that she was so quick to open up. She came here from Germany right after finishing school, and hadn't had much opportunity to make many friends in the States. We made it a habit to chat whenever I brought my aftercare kids to the playground, and talked a lot about our cultural differences, as well as our shared experiences. Obviously, there were limitations in our conversations due to her limited vocabulary, but overall, I was very impressed by her English. About a month after we met, she invited me to her goodbye sleepover party. She was heading back to Germany, and even though we hadn't known each other for very long, she wanted a chance to hang out in a fun, relaxed setting with the few friends she had made here.  Most of them were au pairs from overseas, like her. I agreed, then wondered just what sort of people I would be spending the night with. "Are they crazy partiers? Do Europeans sleep in the nude? What do Europeans think of Asians?"
It turns out, I had absolutely nothing to worry about. They were all great people, with a love for fun and laughter. There were two more girls from Germany, one girl from Austria, One from Columbia, one guy from Denmark, and another guy who wasn't actually an au pair, but was friends with all the au pairs. We played Twister, ate Goodbye cake, and played a hysterical game of hot tub "Never Have I Ever" (which the Columbian girl could never say right) where instead of shots, the losers had to face consequences like having ice cream smeared all over your face then getting hosed off, having to get out of the hot tub and hugging the dry people, and one guy had to endure a full make-over.

So the lesson I learned from that experience was this: You do not need to speak the same language in order to enjoy a beer together, and laugh at people doing stupid stuff.

I love all my friends and family, but every once in a while, it's really great to see the world through another's eyes. Someone who doesn't necessarily agree with your politics or share your background. But if you can just find even one connection with that person, it's a connection worth making :)

Do you Si what I Si?

So there I am, trying desperately not to be gloomy over the fact that millions of families everywhere were holding each other close, and ripping open oodles of presents, while I sit all by my lonesome on an Amtrak, leaving Cary, NC headed to Union Station. I did not have long to wallow in the mud of self-pity, because suddenly I heard a chipper female voice say, "Is anyone sitting here?"
Yes, her name is Si, and she is a 22 year old Chinese girl I met on Christmas day.
Of course, I didn't know she was Chinese at first. I had secretly hoped that she would be, and we might have something in common to talk about, but living in Fairfax has made me accustomed to the high probability that if I meet an Asian on the street, they will be invariably Korean. So I held back the urge to blurt out, "Ni hao."

Si was always the good little Chinese girl from Chicago. She listened to her parents, and worked her butt off in high school. Sure, she had to sacrifice a robust social life, was terribly shy, and looked like a total nerd for most of her high school years, but looking at this Stanford Senior now, I would say she came out just fine.

Physical Description in her own words: Tall. 5'8. Pretty skinny, but I don't work out. Mostly because I'm not fat, so I don't feel motivated. I feel like my face is very flat, and I have single eyelids, so sometimes it's kinda hard to put on makeup. I once considered getting the eyelid surgery done, but then I thought about what I would do if I didn't want the double eyelids anymore. But it's okay. I like the natural look better anyway. I have naturally fuzzy hair, so I straighten it, and I'm obsessed with plucking my eyebrows. Sadly, because I pluck them so much, they're kinda thin, so I have to pencil them in a bit.

So what changed? Si claims that, by senior year of high school, once all the college applications had been turned in, and all the pressure was off, she could just kick back and concentrate on just living. This is when the nerd glasses came off. (Hehe. Funny, because they're just now coming on for me.) Not only did the nerdy facade come off, but also the squeaky clean routine. With her new found freedom at college, Si traded in her Good Girl badge for a fake ID, and hit the bars. (Not too hard. She didn't strike me as a raving alcoholic.)

As always, I ask for a bit of family background. Well of course she had Tiger parents. She's Asian. But she didn't have the kind that remove bathroom privileges until the Bach fugue is mastered. Hers were fairly reasonable. As an only child, she was given all the opportunities, but was not forced. At six she tried the piano. That failed. In the 5th grade, it was the flute for the school band. That didn't last very long either. As a kid, Si wanted to be a teacher. Then in high school, she decided she wanted to be a doctor. That didn't work out so well when she discovered she wasn't so great at chemistry. Now, she just wants to get by. She's okay with just finding some job with which she can support herself. With a business degree from Stanford, a decent command of Mandarin, and a bit of Japanese, no doubt, she'll land on her feet.
The biggest downside to being the only child was that holidays (pretty much all holidays) mostly went by unobserved. With just the three of them, it seemed like a waste to feast and throw elaborate hoopla. Si didn't seem too bothered by it, though, it made me sad to think about it. It's not a holiday for me unless it's too loud for me to hear myself think, and there is a spread of food fit for a troop of Philistines (Giants, for those of you who are biblically illiterate).

Now since I get this question ALL THE TIME, I had to ask her. "Do you have a preference of Asian or Caucasian in the men you are attracted to?" Not really. Her first boyfriend was Chinese, and her current boyfriend of about a year is Caucasian. We could argue that there is some Asian connection in that she met him in Japanese class, but other than that, he's as white as they come. In fact, she was on her way to Alexandria to visit him and his white grandparents over the holidays.

Things that Make Si Smile Real Big:
1) Her boyfriend. Hanging out with him, and getting surprises from him.
2) Cupcakes. Particularly Passion Fruit cupcakes from Kara's Cupcakes.
3) Going to the farmer's market. "Americans don't really get out much, and tend to keep to themselves. Farmer's markets are different. Everyone is out and about in the streets. It's very alive and community feeling."

As the train rolled on, Si became sleepy, and Sudoku was calling my name. So I let her sleep the rest of the way. I hope we weren't being terribly loud. Although the rest of the passengers were silent the whole time so I have a sneaking suspicion that everyone on the train heard our entire conversation. Oh well. Merry Christmas everyone!

Jazzy Bake: Like Easy-Bake for Cultured People

Usually during take-off, I am furiously chewing on gum to keep the pressure out of my ears, gripping my stomach, and loathing the feeling that it is going to float right up, and hit the ceiling of the Boeing 767.
Not Tommy. Cool as a anything, he takes the moistened contact, clamps open his eyelids, and suction cups it right to his eye, then repeats. Who even does that? Takes talent. That's all I can say.

Seeing how my first flight was about 20 minutes late, giving me approximately 10 minutes to sprint through the Atlanta airport to catch my next flight, I was a little too preoccupied catching my breath to notice the young man in the green hoodie and nerd glasses, thoughtfully perusing a book of letters between Jack Kerouac and Allen Ginsberg. I settled into my seat, and gave the appropriate acknowledgement/greeting to my temporary travel companion. He remarked on how "old school" my choice of snack was (fruit roll up), and I offered him one. He politely declined, then I watched with fascination as 26 year old Tommy removed his (presumably) reading glasses, and began inserting his contact lenses as the pressure in the cabin increased and we made our ascent into the great blue.

Once the disequilibrium had faded off, then the real conversation began.
Physical Description in his own Words: "Irish-German. 100% Hunky. I come from pretty good stock. Average height, about 6' tall. I think I'm pretty good looking as it goes. I think sometimes it gets me in trouble. I think I have a pretty good physique for a guy who doesn't exercise. I've got sinewy hands and strong fingers. I've got pretty crazy hair most of the time. It's brown. I'm currently pretty casually dressed. I've got my favorite green sweatshirt on. It's a zipped hoodie. I've got one big tattoo, and one small tattoo. And I like these sunglasses that I'm wearing." (He's wearing Ray Bans.) Though he forgot to mention it, one of the first things I noticed was his WWF "Save the Pandas" shirt underneath the green hoodie.

Starting out, young Tommy wanted to be a movie star. Then he wanted to be a famous singer. Now he wants to be both. "Instead of waiting to be discovered, I'm trying to do it on my own time." Back in high school, he wanted to be Jeff Buckley. Eventually, he discovered that he just wanted to be himself. Cake shop proletarian by day, soulful musician by night, Tommy loves making his own sound. He started playing guitar at age 13, and taught himself to play piano at 16, but he has been singing from the beginning. "I've loved music my whole life." His music is a bit Jazzy, a bit Bluesy, and a bunch of other stuff, but one thing's for sure. It's one hundred percent Tommy.

But where did Tommy come from? His parents met at Lawrenceville, a boarding school in New Jersey. "They quarreled a lot, and divorced when I was six. That had the single greatest effect on me psychologically and behaviorally throughout my whole life." Despite the pain of the divorce, Tommy says that he still has two great parents, and he is close with both. He also has one older sister, with whom he is close, but "could be closer." Overall, he says he had a good childhood.

Things that Make Tommy Smile Real Big: 1) Laughing at himself. "I spend a good portion of my time being the butt of my own jokes. Myself never fails to make me smile."
2) Jazz Music: Ella, Miles, Bossanova, Jaoa Gilberto.
3) A&E's version of Pride and Prejudice. "That s*** cracks me up. I have a soft spot for it. I used to watch it with my sister and my mom, and I find the concentrated British vernacular hilarious."

Tommy's happiest memory can be traced back to the night he directed a play while working as a counselor at a summer camp. "I pulled off a very large production in a very short time. It was a triumph." After the performance, his kids dragged him out on stage for applause. He expected a warm reception, but he was not prepared for the magnitude and force of the audience's praise. "Elation" and "Euphoria," were all he could say to describe the moment. It was a sweet reward for all the hard work he had done.

Most Embarrassing Memory: "The last time I s*** my pants, I was wearing white shorts. I think I was six."

Things Tommy Loves to Hate:
1) Rom-Coms.
2) "Pretty much the majority of mainstream popular culture, especially Lady Gaga.
3) Reality TV, or actually most TV. (The exception being cake shows, particularly Cake Boss) "Reality TV just strikes me as contrived reality. Not very candid."

"Yes to Love. At least once. I met this girl the summer I was 23. We were working at the same summer camp in New Hampshire. She was miraculous. I didn't have any idea, at the time, what kind of profound impact she would have on my life. I just knew I was very attracted to her. She was very beautiful. She was flawless to me. She had flaws, and it only endeared her to me because it made her seem more 'my speed'. At first, there wasn't anything that set her apart. I was just lusting after a beautiful woman. And then we took a chance getting involved. For the first time, I allowed myself to be vulnerable, and I was rewarded with a very spiritual connection with her. What set her apart was that she told me that she loved me, even after I had hurt her. And that meant that she loved me, despite the fact that I was imperfect. That was the first time I ever felt okay being a flawed human being. Then we got to know each other in a very deep and profound way. We traveled together. We lived together. She was the keeper of my secrets, my closest confidant, my best friend. And the best sex I've ever had. But I imagine it was only so because of all the things I just mentioned. Eventually there was some dissonance that we just couldn't resolve. We were both honest about it, because we both felt it. So we separated. I think about her still. Strange to me that she's out there somewhere."
When asked if his first real love was his musical muse, Tommy replies, "She is not my muse. My muse is in my head. I think my mistake was me trying to make this girl my muse. I had to realize that my inspiration is within me."

If Tommy met his 16 year old self on the street, he would say, "I think everyone feels like you feel at your age. You must remember that you're not the center of the universe. You have to remember that a life lived only for the self will invariably be a lonely one, and the more you learn to serve others, the happier you will be. You have much talent, but only by cultivating discipline will you yield results. And when you're in college, don't make out with that girl Caitlin. She has herpes."

Megabus Pt. III: Kathleen

Looks 28, claims 32. She shifts in her seat. She knew I was going to ask her questions, and she had already agreed to be interviewed, but I don't think Kathleen knew that I was going to pry into her private life. Luckily, I picked her apart last, giving her plenty of time to prepare her answers. I think she felt better going last, after hearing the other stories, and figuring out that we were every bit as human as she. 


In her own words, she describes herself as, "Short, athletic build, fair skinned, bleached blonde, freckle faced, long hair. My favorite physical feature is my eyelashes. They’re long."


I thought she was a Californian, as she pulled off the blonde quite convincingly. But she stuns me with the knowledge that she is, in fact, Italian. If we're gonna be nit-picky, she is actually Irish-Italian, with a tiny bit of Native American and a tiny bit of French thrown in there. She typically identifies more strongly with her Irish side, both cultural influences were very present in her upbringing. She had a very Italian grandfather who had a tanning bed in his basement. (And the tanning goggles.) But let's start with her parents. 


Kathleen's parents were from the same hometown. Her mother was an Northern Irish/Democratic Activist, who moved out to San Francisco to be a full-time hippie.  While there, she married someone who was NOT Kathleen's father. Eventually, she came back to Massachussetts after having the marriage annulled. She was already acquainted with her future husband, because he had dated her best friend from high school.  They reconnected, got hitched, and have been together ever since. When asked if her father shares her mother's passion for activism, Kathleen responds, "Dad just kind of lets mom do her thing. Mom’s the feisty one." Ironically, when it came to raising her and her younger brother, Kathleen's former hippie mother was always really strict to protect them from making her mistakes.


Growing up, Kathleen wanted to be a  marine biologist. But then she actually figured out that science wasn’t really her thing, so it sort of fell by the way side. (Who hasn't wanted to be a marine biologist at some point in their life? I think it's a phase we all go through.) As she grew older, she cultivated a love for music. This led to her latest "crazy" dream - to be a DJ. What were the chances that I ended up sitting next to two aspiring DJs? Kathleen took some classes, and decided it was right up her avenue. Interestingly enough, her interests don't stop there. Turns out, Kathleen also does a bit of improv comedy and comedy writing on the side.


So now that we know what she WANTS to do, what is it that she actually does? She's an attorney at the Federal Trade Commission.  Obviously, my next question had to be, "HOW THE HECK DID YOU END UP THERE?" For a while, Kathleen also considered going into linguistics. She knew she wanted to go to grad school, and started doing international development. That was her realistic goal, doing foreign service. But she didn’t know exactly what she wanted to do, so she ended up at law school.  Kathleen is also very interested in Latin America, and can speak Spanish tolerably well.


There is not necessarily one major embarrassing event that Kathleen recalls, but she does have memories of living in a continuous embarrassed state. It was the 80’s. Mom used to dress her. "I wanted to wear the crazy, bright fluorescent things, but my mom never let me." Instead, Kathleen was made to dress conservatively, and kids being the mean little monsters they are, she got made fun of, and was really embarrassed. All the time.


But then, Kathleen grew up, and she got to pick out her own clothes, and make some happy memories. Her best memory was the time she lived in San Fran for a summer. "The feeling of living there, and just being there was just amazing. I felt a sense of freedom that I rarely experience. I was a newcomer, and it was only temporary, and didn’t know anyone, and had no obligations to anyone." Kathleen discovered that she is happiest when she is in exploration mode. 
 

Things that make Kathleen smile real big: 1) Comedy. Laughing in general. Luis C.K. is at the top of her list for standup. 2) Music. Good music. Her favorite genres include classic R&B, funk and disco, and old school hip hop.  She loves Otis Redding, Steely Dan, and Hall & Oats. 3) In general, she is really interested in people. Working towards a good cause, and helping people in need rank especially high on her priorities list.

Love: "It’s so complicated right now." Just like her fellow DJ, 2 is the magical number of love. Both happened very recently. One of them was her boyfriend of 2+ years. They just broke up about three months ago. The other is someone she met a year and a half ago. "We were friends. When my boyfriend and I broke up last winter, me and this friend started hanging out together, and developed feelings for each other." Then the boyfriend came back into the picture and said he really wanted to be together again. "I asked if he could see a future together, and he said he didn’t know. So we went our separate ways." During that time, the friend and Kathleen got closer. Finally,  the boyfriend came back and said, "I want us, I want the family, the whole deal." So Kathleen and ex-boyfriend got back together, and moved in together. Shortly after getting into this arrangement, Kathleen was getting the feeling that it wasn't working out. On top of that, her friend that she had feelings for was really upset that she had gotten back with her boyfriend.  "I was upset because I was totally unsure of what to do." Now that Kathleen and her old boyfriend are officially over, she has been working to reconnect with her special friend, and trying to show him that he means more to her than just rebound. 

I hope everything works out for you, Kathleen.

Kathleen was poised and ready for the final question. If she met her 16 year old self, she would tell her, "RE-LAX. I was way too serious. It was good that I worked hard, but I overdid it."

So with three new profiles under my belt, and the five hour journey home nearly complete, that's exactly what I did. I sat back and let the lull of gentle conversation roll in and out of my consciousness. Thank you, Megabus.

Megabus Pt. II: G

I was riveted. They were just so long. They must have taken a lifetime to grow. "10 years," was the response to my query concerning the mammoth dreads gracing the head of the passenger to my left.

His real name is Garrett, but apparently, no one seems to be able to remember it, so he goes by "G."

All G wanted to do as a boy was grow up to play for the Chicago Bulls, right next to Michael Jordan. Is that too much to ask? I guess so. G's childhood dreams of NBA stardom were crushed his Sophomore year of high school, when he didn't make the basketball team. However, he does still carry fond basketball related memories of classmate Andrew Bynum. "His best friend was this short, white kid, and me and my friends thought he was just a loser. When he got drafted, he had a draft party, and me and my friends wanted so badly to get into that party. Just goes to show you can’t take people for granted."

Alas, Basketball was not his calling, but shortly after, G discovered his true passion. Music. He DJed a high school dance, and it was love at first scratch. Sporting his vinyl records, he took on the name DJ Blakout, and took control of the dance floor. "I’ll never forget playing Usher’s 'Yeah'.  It was the best experience ever." 

Now G is 25, and his current dream is to DJ around the world. So far, his globetrotting has only extended as far as Jamaica. But I don't think his dream includes a repeat of that ill-fated Spring Break trip to the Islands, where he was given mono by his female traveling companion.

While that dream is still very much alive, G also has his day job. For the past three years, he has been working as a middle school teacher in Philly. He taught with the Teachers for America Program. Pretty hardcore. He also worked with kids with autism. I actually caught him on his way to an interview for an admin position in the DC public school system. 

Physical Description in his own words: 5’10, 5’11 on a good day. I kinda feel like I’m short, so that’s one of my biggest insecurities. (Chris butts in: “You’d hate my sister. She’s 6’1”) 183 lbs. Used to be like, 210, so I lost some weight about a year or so. All attributed to changing my diet, running, and water. Water is everything to me. (More on that later.)  When it comes to complexion, I try to go by mocha or cocoa. I’m more brown skinned. Decade long dread locks. One more of my insecurities is my taco meat. I like having a little hair on my chest. Plaid, flannel shirt, can’t go anywhere without my Levis. Levi Strauss is my friend.  I always have something on my wrists. A watch, a random Jordan band, and a simple bead bracelet my soon to be wife made for me. To the best of my knowledge, both my parents are African American. I may have some Native American in me, but if I do, it’s very small.

G's immediate family consists of his mother, Sherri, and his cat, Godiva. Mom lives in New Brunswick under the fastidious rule of Godiva, the "boss of the house". Being an only child, G admits that he was spoiled rotten, but even he had to concede to the whims of Lady Godiva, who "does absolutely nothing but be cute and cause trouble," and whose lips have never touched anything but Fancy Feast.  

Obviously, it requires two to give life to baby G, and he most certainly had a father. However, his father left when he was still an infant.  But there is a happy side to the story. With a grin, G relates, "My father and I just now recently reestablished our relationship, now that he’s cleaned himself up." 

G Shares his most Embarrassing Moments: First grade. "I went on myself. I don’t think the other kids noticed, and I was able to discreetly slip out, but I knew. The other embarrassing moment was when I was in middle school. It involved one of my close childhood friends, Patrick Miller. I told him IN CONFIDENCE, that I liked Ashley Diggs, who’s actually Lauren Hill’s cousin. The next day at school, EVERYBODY knew. I guess I wasn’t handsome or something because she was totally not into me.  I never got my opportunity with her. Oh yeah. Also, when in college, Mom walked in on me having sex."

Happiest Memory: "The first time I played Craig Mack’s “Flava in Your Ear” remix on  my turn table, that’s when I decided that this is what I need to be doing."

Things that Make G Smile Real Big: 

1) Good times with family and friends. Being able to enjoy peoples’ company. 

2) Meeting new people. Learning peoples’ stories. 

3) Thanksgiving. "My mom worked so hard, so she rarely came home and cooked. My mom used to bring me supersize fries all the time, so I was a chubby little kid. Thanksgiving was the only time that she came home and cooked, and when she cooked, she threw it down."  

4) Music: To get an idea of just how much G cares about music, one only has to glance at his wrist, where he sports a bracelet that says, “God is Music.” "Death Cab for Cutie changed my life. I’m now completely open to all kinds of music.  My turn table is my guitar. One artist that  encompasses it all, Girl Talk.  That’s how I feel about music."

5) Water: A good glass of water. G has plenty to say about it. "I don’t touch Dasani and I don’t touch Nestle water.  I was introduced to Fiji water at Rutger’s Fest. I was helping to put the concerts together, and the rapper requested Fiji water.  I tasted it and it literally changed my perspective on life. It was heaven in a bottle.  No matter how I’m feeling, a bottle of water calms me down, changes my day. But at the end of the day, it’s Poland Spring  for me.  It is the originator, the innovator, and the trailblazer of the bottled water movement."

L'amour- Twice has he fallen. The first, when he was 14. Her name was Jasmine, from East Orange. She could sing anything. She even sang opera, and it was the most beautiful thing young G had ever heard. "She’s also kinda one of the reasons I grew my hair out," he confesses. Apparently, one of the best way to get girls to talk to you was to ask the girls to do your hair. Jasmine did everybody’s hair, so it made sense for G to grow his hair out. The next year, she did his hair, and they started dating. 

G's second bout with love came about two years ago. "This girl, I went all out, balls to the wall for her. I’m not mister romantic, but I was head over heels."  He whisked her away to Atlantic City, took her to a concert, got the champagne, the roses, the chocolate covered strawberries, the whole nine yards. In the end, not only did she break his wallet, but she broke his heart as well. "Messed me up for a long time." 

If G ran into his 16 year old self, he would tell young G to be open to new things. "Be open minded to new things, new people, new experiences." 

At this point, our bus stopped in Baltimore and we had to bid our new friend, Chris adieu. But then our attention turned to Kathleen, who ironically, also shared G's dream of becoming a DJ. 

To be continued...

Megabus Pt. I : Chris

I hit the jackpot! On my five hour bus ride home from NYC, I had the grand fortune of sitting next to, not one but, THREE friendly individuals, who let me pick their life stories apart.

The first one to get the conversation going was 23 year old Maryland native, Chris. It all started when he noticed I was having trouble keeping my Naked Red Machine juice from slipping through the ghetto, bottomless cup-holder in the table. Not wanting to leave a damsel in distress, Chris gallantly whipped out his handy dandy roll of duct tape. Problem solved. 

Physical Description in his own words: 6’3, 210 lbs. Strawberry blonde hair, green eyes, athletic. Could lose a little around the midsections, but athletic nonetheless. Tall, handsome, Jew nose.  Favorite physical feature is my legs. They're powerful, fast, and can do a lot. 

Chris has his Polish and German blood to thank for his very Aryan features. (Haha. A German with a Jew nose.) Although, it never had a huge impact on his day to day upbringing or lifestyle. Maybe on the occasional family gathering. He has a "very Polish uncle," who always drinks honey whiskey at Thanksgiving. I guess if you drink honey whisky, that makes you Polish. But don't let the blonde hair fool you. Chris has never been out of the U.S. and he does not celebrate October Fest. What kind of German are you? 

As ein junges kind, Chris dreamed of being an Air-force pilot. He always played and dabbled with flight simulators. There was just something so fascinating about being in the open skies, and being able to control where you wanted to go. Going faster than light, and of course, all the fire power behind it. Chris currently works in IT for Jaguar Tech as a Systems Engineer. And though his Air-force Piloting dreams seem to have taken a bit of a dive, he has not given up on dreaming altogether.  His dream occupation has become more jovial in nature. Chris can't think of anything that would make him happier than getting paid to do standup comedy. He loves being onstage, and loves to make people laugh. It's kind of his thing.

And who better to cheer you on toward your dreams and laugh at your jokes when no one else thinks they're funny than your loving family. Though Chris's mom passed away from cancer not too long ago, he still has his two older sisters, and his dad. Yes. Chris is the youngest, and he was kind of spoiled. But dad kept him in check. I don't know much about Mom except that she was married once before to some guy named Harry who was hairy everywhere but his head, as the story goes.

When it comes to embarrassing moments in Chris's life, I learned that he has battled with stage fright, and apparently lost a few times. Hmm. Not too promising for our budding comedian. The other time Chris remembers being particularly embarrassed was the time Mom caught him looking at things he shouldn’t have online.  That, or the time a guy professed his love for him (when he knew Chris had a girlfriend). Isn't that how it always goes? One just can't always help who one falls for. 

Even though Chris's life library has its share of stories of the humiliating genre, it has it's share of happy ones as well. Some of his most cherished memories are about his very first bike. Huffy, bright neon green and black, with lights on the front.  "I rode the hell out of that bike... then destroyed it after jumping off a 5 foot ramp."

Things that Make Chris Smile Real Big: 1) Death Cab for Cutie. Or more specifically, Benjamin Gibbard. Thus, Postal Service also makes this list. "He’s this era’s Paul Simon." 2) Exercise. "Nothing better than getting on my bike and going for 20-25 miles." 3) People watching. Watching kids enjoying the simple things in life. (Like candy? JK. Creep much?)  4) Making other people smile. "Seeing other people happy puts a smile on my face." 5) Exotic foods: Sushi, Thai food, Indian Food, Pho, etc.

Chris has been struck by Love's arrow all of three times. The first was with his first girlfriend. That was puppy love. The second was with his high school sweetheart. Apparently, that didn't work out so well because she was very shallow and narrow minded. Finally, there is his current girlfriend. I asked what it was about her that he loved, and here is what he had to say: "I love the way she can think on her own. She's very free thinking.  I love how we’re able to be completely honest with each other, no matter if it's good or bad." Granted, he did not deny that there was also great physical attraction. Chris also mentioned that he treasured the ability to, no matter what day it was, just talk on the phone for an hour, for no reason at all.

If Chris ran into his 16 year old self on the street, he definitely would have pushed himself to go further in secondary education. "I would have given myself a heads up in life."

As the bus dropped Chris off at his stop in Baltimore, me and the Megabus gang wave to our new friend as he makes faces at us from the other side of the window. Thanks for helping us pass the time, Chris. You sure made us smile.